I had this funny feeling...

*written on April 17th. Go easy on me. I just found out*

On Sunday we spent the whole day gardening. It was back breaking. I was digging, weeding and planting with the hubby. I was really exhausted but I thought to myself that it was all the manual garden labor and I needed to get in better shape. Then that night when it came time to eat I was so excited about dinner but when Tim brought in the grilled veggies that I adore, I couldn't eat them. In fact, I felt nauseous. Shouldn't that have been a sign?! I brushed it aside but still...I had this funny feeling.

Monday rolls around and Tim left for another business trip. (he has been gone every week that month) I was really tired at work and still kinda off so that night I looked at James and thought to myself "maybe I should just take the last test in the box. Just so I don't think about it all week." So I did. Then I left the bathroom. I casually walked back in a few minutes later and looked at the test....

"HOLY S*&T!"- I said that out loud btw

I couldn't believe it. I mean really. I left it and walked back to look at it like 5 more times. Each time I left the bathroom I looked at the pup like he would have an explanation for this. (He didn't)

I was freaking out to say the least. It couldn't be. First off, Tim was traveling soo much this month. (I guess not that much)  Last month my supposed "window" was much later (Guess I was wrong about that too). Plus, I still had a week before my little friend flow was coming. *you will see in later stories that this gets explained* Yet there it was...and it was just me and the pup and whatever reality show I was watching at the time.

At this point I was thinking- I need to call Tim.

But he was traveling and I really wanted to see his expression in person. Plus, if I was him I wouldn't want to find out when I am hundreds of miles away in a hotel room. I grappled with this back and forth for a little bit a long time. I even picked up the phone at one point but I resisted.

I can keep this secret...even if its for 3 more days. I didn't want to call any of my close friends yet because Tim didn't know and I wanted him to be the first...besides the pup and I. So that was it. I freaked out in our living room the rest of the night. I started calculating when I was due, what "it" was doing right now in my stomach and what was I going to do about all the things we had planned. That is kinda where I am right now. It's almost like a dream because its just my little secret. No one knows so it almost doesn't seem real. And it all started because I had this funny little feeling...